Last Candidate Standing

With Winner Geri Tramutola of the Workless Party
With Winner Geri Tramutola of the Workless Party

Last Friday I took part in one of the most fun events of the campaign – The Last Candidate Standing. As Replace Magazine’s Sean Ruthen reports: “And rounding out the trio, Sean Bickerton voiced his concerns for minority groups, alluding to the recent California overturning of their same-sex marriage laws.

The question posed to them by the panel was quite serious, concerning mental health and homelessness issues in the Lower Mainland, of which Sean and Betty gave the most considerate responses. Sean advanced  to the final round, as he most effectively responded to the question of affordable housing. 

According to Frances Bula’s report, the question that decided the winner was: “Thinking back to Mr. Peanut’s campaign to be mayor, which cartoon character would you pick to run city hall?”

Sean Bickerton picked Barney. “Superman would impose solutions but Barney is probably a better example. He’s friendly to children and transparent and open in his decision-making process.”

The next night, on Saturday, I participated in the Creative City Cabaret, along with a standout performance by Peter Ladner singing a song he wrote and accompanying himself on the guitar.

The Sun’s Peter Birnie reports that The octogenarian activist Betty Krawczyk, who “offered some soft-shoe tap to the loud sounds of Bob Seger’s “Old Time Rock n’ Roll” was charming, as (was) council candidate Sean Bickerton when he read his own straight-ahead poem about coming to grips with being in a same-sex relationship south of the border.”

The Dangers of Gay Marriage

Where, oh where, is Osama bin Laden?
Has anyone ever looked in Baden-Baden?
We seek him here, we seek him there …
That damned elusive baluchithere!

Have a concern about Avian Flu?
The folks at WHO say it could be for you!
Tommy Thompson said we’re quite unprepared,
So people watching news reports are very, very scared!

Say, did you see that Hurricane Katrina?
Al Gore’s saying the next one could be even meaner!
We’re all adrift together on global warming’s rising tide,
So batten down the hatches folks, it may be quite a ride!

Then there’s all that violence in the deserts of Iraq
Hard to hear the good news over all that clackety-clack!
Day after day with more IEDs going “Boom!”
It’s tough not to feel an impending sense of doom.

The Dow Jones is headed South,
Anne Coulter runs off her foul mouth,
Pastors pray for God to kill judges
What’s left of their souls but wrinkled up smudges?

Republicans revel in attacks against gays,
Dems try to vamp while counting the days;
The unitary executive keeps expanding its power,
While the Courts and the Congress dither and cower.

Healthcare’s a joke
For all common folk,
And wages get smaller
Along with our dollar.

Gas prices are way too high
Way too many terrorists too willing to die;
Republicans say we’ve got way too many wetbacks
And Lord knows we’ve faced way too many setbacks!

But have no fear, help is at hand,
For the leader of the Senate has said
There’ll be no gay weddings at all in this land:
In this nation gay marriage is dead.